Tag Archives: depression

Fear is Like Gravity – It Holds You Down

1 Nov

Be thankful for gravity. If not for just the perfect amount of gravity we would all be floating around uncontrollably, which could be a real problem as we dodge other people, cars, trucks and virtually anything not nailed down.

Fear, on the other hand holds us down too, but unfortunately in a more insidious and harmful way. Fear, when not faced and overpowered, will often freeze us in place. Afraid to make a decision, afraid to make a choice, afraid to take a chance, we often do nothing.

I have a very close friend in that position right now and I’m not sure how to help him. Brent has been married for around 30 years to a woman I’m not sure he ever loved. They have 3 beautiful children and 3 grandchildren. Brent was never a great father but he’s making up for that now by being a wonderful grandfather.

Brent has been out of work for approximately 2 years and has not found another job. And I’m beginning to believe he doesn’t want one. Money is now tight. Very tight. I have suggested to him that with the kids all grown and his marriage an empty shell to just walk away from the life he’s lead, and begin a new life, one of his choosing.

But Brent can’t choose. He can’t make a decision. And actually as I look back on his life, he’s always let others around him make the decisions for him. I wonder why that’s so. He grew up like me in Chicago, but I don’t think his parents or his siblings had problems making a decision, only Brent. Brent has always been paralyzed by fear.

Recently, I read an article about a study of how people respond to emergency situations and it described an airplane crash with survivors. Some people would get up immediately and head for the exits. Others would instinctively look around for other survivors and help them to escape. And then there were those who just sat in their seats, paralyzed with fear, who did nothing. And that’s where rescuers found them. Dead in their seats. And there were more of these people then you would imagine.

I’m stymied. I love Brent like a brother and I’m at a loss as to how to help him. If I just gave him money he’d use it to pay his immediate bills, but in a matter of weeks he’d be back to where he is now.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I can’t help Brent. Maybe all I can do is offer him the tools, the encouragement and the support, and the rest is up to him.

Love,

Michael

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The Life You Are Living!

30 Jul

Luckman’s Law: The life you are living is the life that you have created. If you don’t like it – change it. Nothing will change it for you.

How many times have I heard someone say, “I wish I could change my life?” How many times in my lifetime have I said it?

At one time or another we have all uttered these words. We might have said them when something went wrong, or when we were feeling sad and dejected. For those of us who fight depression, these words often become our daily mantra.

We beseech the heavens with our hopes and wishes for a better life. But, hope is a pessimist looking at things optimistically. Hope is wishing, and neither will change your life.

But, what will change your life – is you. Yes, you. You hold the power to create the life you are longing to live. You have always had this power. You just didn’t know how to use it.

We are literally given everything we ask for. Unfortunately, for most, we don’t realize we are asking for all the things we don’t want in our lives, as well as all the things we do want. We do it through our negative thoughts and the words we utter.

With over 90% of the thoughts we dwell on considered negative it’s no wonder we attract so many of the things we don’t want. And, here is how we do it; The woman running a half marathon says to others, “I hope I’m able to finish the race.” When she should be thinking and saying, “I know that I’ll not only finish this race, but I’ll be amongst the top 10 finishers.”

The student thinking and sharing their thoughts with others about an upcoming political science final exam says, “I hope I’ll pass the final.” They should be thinking, “I have spent this past semester learning about political science. I am knowledgeable about the subject and am confident I will do extremely well on the final.”

The salesperson sitting at their desk with a telephone and a list of suspects thinks, “I hate making these calls. I doubt I’ll even set one meeting.” Their conversation with themselves should be, “I know the more calls I make the more meetings I’ll book. I expect to set three meetings today!”

Many great thinkers throughout history have spoken these words, Change your thoughts and you will change your life!!!

But, no one has the power to do it for you. Only you hold that power.

With love,

Michael

Don’t Count Your Chickens

28 Jun

I wish I had a buck for every time as a kid I heard, “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.” It was usually my mother who said it and it was typically in response to something I wanted, or felt I needed in my life. Every time I heard it I would cringe.

I know that when my mother uttered these words she was doing what she felt was best for me. She wanted to protect me from the hurt, pain and disappointment that I would experience when I didn’t achieve what I desired. This could be anything from wanting to be a patrol boy in grade school, to wanting to be on the football team in high school, to asking out the cutest girl in my class, to my desire to join a fraternity in college. She was afraid that I would get my hopes up “too high” and thus feel tremendous loss when I failed to succeed.

Her words were never a comfort to me. They were more a reminder that I would probably fail. As a kid I had no knowledge of the Law of Attraction. But deep inside I had this inner knowing that asking for what I wanted, believing it would manifest in my life and expecting that I would succeed, made me feel good. And hearing these words, spoken by my loving mother, felt like being drenched with a large bucket of cold water. Immediately, my thoughts would change from positive to negative, from success to imminent failure. As my thoughts changed so did my mood. It would go from positive, happy and expectant, to one of fear and depression.

As an adult and a student of spirituality, I know the secret of manifesting in your life all that you desire. It requires vigilance. It requires you to ask for what you want. It requires you to visualize yourself already in possession of what you want. It requires you to believe that what you ask for will indeed come to you. And it requires you to expect what you desire to arrive in your life, as if you were waiting for UPS to deliver what you ordered on Amazon.

Hearing “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch,” at this critical time will do only one thing, destroy your efforts to create YOUR perfect life.

Don’t listen to people who say these words, and never say them to anyone you love and care about!

With Love,

Michael

Do You Really Need Your Ego?

29 May

Your ego is your friend. Am I right? No! That’s WRONG! Your ego is your sworn enemy. In fact, if you died tomorrow, your ego could not care less. Of course, when your body dies, your ego dies too. But your ego doesn’t know that.

At birth you had no ego. But as you grew you began to develop this ego to help distinguish your being from others. My name, Michael Luckman, and my ego differentiate me from all other humans. And thus I live and act in an ego based world.

The reason I dislike the ego so much is because it constantly compares us to others. We ask ourselves: Am I as smart as Roger? Is my home larger than my neighbor’s? Am I taller than John? Is Bob a better baseball player? Am I as pretty as Suzy? Is my car more expensive than Sam’s? Is my dress sexier than Sharon’s.

When the answers to these inquiries are yes, you feel pretty good about yourself. But what happens when the answer comes back a no? What then?

Typically, the first emotion you feel is fear, and a total emptiness inside. Then comes a loss of self-esteem followed by a loss of self-confidence. And when that happens you are unable to function at your best; at work, at home and at play.

What would happen if you killed off your ego and stopped listening to it? Actually nothing. Nothing, except for the disappearance of all negative feelings of jealousy, frustration, fear, rage, shame, anger, embarrassment, depression, inferiority and worry (did I miss anything?).

Not a bad tradeoff. Right?

With Love,

Michael

Life’s Greatest Thief!

15 Mar

If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today. ~E. Joseph Cossman

Obviously the point of this quote is not to test your memory but to remind you that over 90% of the things we worry about never happen. And yet, for so many, worry is a daily event.

Worry is a thief. It doesn’t steal your wallet or your purse. It doesn’t steal your identity or your job. Its thievery is much greater. It steals your life.

Worry robs you of all your joy and happiness, as if a giant Dyson vacuum was attached to you sucking out your very existence. For who can really exist when overwhelmed with worry and the fear and depression that accompanies it.

Your natural state is to be an optimist. After all, our ancestors would not have survived if they did not absolutely believe that tomorrow would be a better day. But worry turns your optimism against you. It blinds your vision with defeat and despair. And for what? NOTHING! Worry has no value.

If you’re worried about something, ask yourself is it in your control to change the situation. If the answer is yes, then go ahead and act. Change the situation. If the answer is no, then why even go through the emotional turmoil of worrying. You have no power to change the situation.

To defeat worry use my positive affirmation; Infinite Spirit I cast upon you the burden of my negative thought about (add your worry) and I go free. Say this as many times as it takes to free yourself from your worrisome thoughts. Now fill the vacuum left by the departure of negative thoughts with something positive that brings joy to your life.

Don’t ever forget that you are incredibly powerful. So powerful that you can literally change your mind!

With Love,

Michael