Tag Archives: decisions

Check Your Ego at the Door

24 Oct

Check your ego at the door and check your gut instead. Every right decision I have ever made has come from my gut. ~Oprah Winfrey

If you read my book Overpowering Fear – Defeating the #1 Challenge in Sales and Life you’ll know that I don’t think much of the ego, yours or mine.

Your ego is not your friend. Its sole purpose is to compare you to others. And when that happens you’re either going to win or lose. If your ego finds you superior to another or another’s possessions, you feel good about yourself. If your ego finds you lacking compared to another you feel terrible. There is no in-between.

Whenever you make a decision based upon what your ego is telling you the probability that you’ll make the wrong decision is at its highest. But when you allow intuition to guide you, you can almost never be wrong.

Intuition communicates through your gut. When you make the right decision your gut speaks to you through your heart, and makes it sing. It’s at that moment that you know you made the RIGHT decision.



Blessing or Curse?

1 Feb

The key to accepting responsibility for your life is to accept the fact that your choices, every one of them, are leading you in inexorably to either success or failure, however you define those terms. – Neil Boortz

Neal Boortz is an American radio host, author, and self-described libertarian political commentator. While I don’t necessarily agree with Mr. Boortz’ political views, every once in a while I come across one of his quotes that just makes sense. The above is one of them.

If you’ve followed my missives for even a short period of time you know that I am a firm believer in free choice. It is God’s gift to us, his children. And it can be looked at as both a curse and a blessing, depending on how you use it.

I’ll bet that each of you knows at least one person who is always beset by problems. It seems that nothing in their life goes right for them, as if they always have a dark rain cloud over their head. But if you know them well enough you probably know why nothing goes right for them.

Maybe they love to party and often have a little too much to drink. Then ignoring the warnings from their friends, they get into their car and drive off, only to be stopped by a cop and arrested for a DUI. I had a neighbor like this and after his third DUI lost his driver’s license. His already high insurance premium tripled and his boss was threatening to fire him. On top of that his wife was at the point where she was seriously thinking about kicking him out of the house.

When we’d see each other over the weekend all he could talk about was how the world was conspiring against him. How his life was in the toilet and this seemed to be the way it always was for as long as he could remember. When I tried to show him how he might have been somehow responsible for how things were, he looked at me as if I had just insulted him. He could not see any correlation between his actions (cause) and the negative circumstances in his life (effects).

People will often say that if God loved them he wouldn’t let bad things happen to them. But think about this for a moment; Did God really abandon these people or did God say to them, “I love you and I want you to pursue your own happiness, so I am giving you this wonderful gift, you can make your own choices. I will not interfere. I will offer you guidance, but the final choice will always be yours. But remember my child that you will always reap what you sow. Thus, you must always choose wisely!”

To making the best choices,


P.S. Parents, the greatest gift you can give your children is to teach them how to choose wisely.

Other’s Lives Are Not Always What We Think

4 Jan

People assume I’m out there having this great life, but money doesn’t erase the pain. When you’re young you barrel through life, making choices without thinking of repercussions. A few years down the line, you wake up in a certain place and wonder how the hell you got there. – Jennifer Lopez

So beautiful, so talented, and so very much like each of us.

There are two very important lessons to be learned in today’s quote. So let’s talk about them.

I think growing up in America most of us share a common dream; to be rich, talented and famous. And the wonderful thing about this great country is that each of us has an equal opportunity to achieve what we seek. It’s the American Dream. Of course, we do need a little talent to begin with.

But there is a lie behind the dream. The lie is that once we attain our fame and riches our lives will somehow be perfect. We expect to be happy. We expect to magically overpower and face all of our fears and demons. We expect tranquility, but instead those who reach their dream often feel the same fears, doubts and uncertainties they did before they became famous.

Fame, fortune and notoriety may drive your ego to the point of arrogance, but it won’t change how you view yourself. Only you can make that change by controlling the thoughts you allow to take hold in your mind.

The other important lesson to be learned in today’s quote is this: every day you make hundreds, perhaps even thousands of decisions. Most you do unconsciously without much forethought. What should I have for lunch? Should I take the freeway or surface streets to work? Others we do consciously by giving more thought and consideration to the decision we will make; should I accept that position in Boston and how will this affect my family?

Each decision is a choice, and each choice has its consequences and repercussions. Some of those will be good, some bad and some dire. There is a name for this; we call it Cause and Effect. Every choice you make is a cause and what happens afterwards to you are its effects.

Ms. Lopez believes that it happens to you mostly when you’re young. I disagree. Unless you learn how cause and effect works in your life you will continue to make wrong, kneejerk choices. And those choices will bring into your life exactly what you don’t want.

So my advice: Think things through before you make your decision. Then choose wisely.

To your dreams and better choices,