Tag Archives: American Dream

Do You Put Limits on Your Dreams?

9 Aug

You might look at the title of this article and think, “Who would ever put limits on their dreams? That’s crazy. I’d never do that.” But you do it all the time and you’re not alone. Just about everyone limits their dreams. Some even do it every day. And most don’t even know when they’re doing it.

An interesting truth: According to A Course in Miracles each of us was born for Magnitude, but often accept Littleness because we don’t believe we deserve the Greatness and the Glory that comes with Magnitude.

From A Course in Miracles: “Be not content with littleness, but be sure you understand what littleness is, and why you could never BE content with it. Littleness is the offering you gave YOURSELF. You offered this in place of magnitude, AND ACCEPTED IT. Everything in this world is little, because it is a world made out of littleness, in the strange belief that littleness CAN content you. When you strive for anything in the world, WITH THE BELIEF THAT IT WILL BRING YOU PEACE, you are belittling yourself, and blinding yourself to glory. Littleness and glory are the choices open to your striving and your vigilance. You will ALWAYS choose one AT THE EXPENSE of the other.”

“God is not willing that His Children be content with less than everything.”

Let me explain how we go about choosing Littleness over Glory and Greatness. We do it with our thoughts and our deepest beliefs about ourselves. The secrets about ourselves that we would never share with others. And the biggest secret of all is that we don’t believe that we deserve to have, be and do everything we desire. How did this happen?

Each of us was born perfect; then our parents, other family members, teachers and even our friends and siblings got ahold of us. They defined us. They told us what we were good at and what things to avoid because we lacked the smarts or the talents to succeed. They might have told us to find a good job after high school because we weren’t college material. That we shouldn’t wait for our prince or princess because, “Hey, just look in the mirror!” They warned us to put our childish dreams away because what we were seeking didn’t happen for people “like” us. They may have even admonished you to stop dreaming and be realistic. And, so you accepted a life of Littleness instead of the plan God had for you of Magnitude, Glory and Greatness.

I expect that a number of you reading this will adamantly disagree with my theory. You’ll say, “Not me. Never.” And maybe it isn’t you. But, here is the perfect way to find out if it is true for you. Monitor your speech and feelings. If you refuse invitations because you’re uncomfortable and beg off. It’s true. If someone suggests a perfect opportunity for you but the first thing that comes to mind is fear and belief that you’ll fail. It’s true. If you ever respond to a suggestion by saying, “I’m never been good at that.” It’s true. If you still have dreams but you let fear stand in your way. It’s true. If you’re embarrassed by a compliment. It’s true.

But the truth is not always real. It’s just what you believe.

With Love,


You Don’t Like it, Change it!

4 Feb

For many of us, our lives are plagued with fear and worry about what the future holds. I’m not just talking about the long range future of five, ten, twenty years, but what’s going to happen today, tomorrow, next week, the end of the month.

This article was written for a Monday morning publication, actually the day after the Super Bowl. How did you wake up this morning? Other than maybe a little hangover from one too many Buds, did you wake up optimistic about what the new day would bring you? Or, did you wake up with fear and dread of the day ahead of you?

Was it going to be another day of dreading being stuck in traffic and maybe being late to work? Was it dread of putting up with the boss or your co-workers? Did you leave the house in fear of meeting with an angry client? Did you see a gray hair or another wrinkle this morning that made you feel old? Are you constantly asking yourself, “Where did my dreams go?”

Would you like to change all this? Good, then we can work together to solve this problem.

First, it is said that over 90% of what we worry about never comes to pass. Mark Twain said it best, “I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened!” Think about this for a moment, by a ratio of 9 to 1, what we worry about never ever happens. So, why do we make ourselves and our lives miserable worrying about something that will probably never happen? Unless we make it happen. And we do that.

The Law of Attraction says that we are constantly creating the things in our life through what we give thought, emotion and expectation to. That includes all the good and all the bad. So it is obvious that if you change your thoughts you can change your attitude from one of lack and limitation, to one of constant joy, happiness, peace and abundance. And here is how to do it.

First, you must believe in a higher power. It could be God, the Universe, Jesus, Infinite Spirit, Allah. It doesn’t matter much, they are just names for “all that is.” Next, when you are feeling worry and dread you are going to ask your higher power for exactly the opposite of what you fear. As an example, you fear your boss, and aren’t sure what she’s got in store for you that day. So what is the opposite of this scenario? It is a day where your boss is in a perfect mood and sees all that you do to contribute to the success of the company. So ask your higher power for exactly that; Infinite Spirit, I desire a perfect day at work today. I want a day where I accomplish a great amount quality work and my boss recognizes my positive contributions to the company’s success. Say that when you first awake and throughout the day.

Hey! This is not rocket science. It’s just you becoming comfortable asking for what you want. Remember, it is not that you ask God for too much, but that you ask her for too little.

To a wonderful week,


Giving Your Own Eulogy!

30 Jan

Studies have shown that people’s #1 fear is speaking in public. Fortunately you won’t have to give the eulogy at your own funeral. ~Michael Luckman

As many of you know, I closed my sales training business several years ago to follow my passion. For the past twenty plus years I have been studying why we as human beings experience fear when faced with a threat of bodily harm. Well that’s an easy one to answer, survival. Okay, that’s not the question. The real question I have been trying to answer is; why do we experience the same fear, the same physiological responses when facing an imaginary fear, like walking up to a complete stranger or getting up front of a group of people to share with them something that is important? Unless you’re in the wrong neighborhood, why do we tremble at introducing ourselves to a stranger? Or, why do we fear our mind will go blank when we get up to speak?

The reason I have made a study of fear is that fear has been my nemesis since I was a child. Not a day went by that I didn’t experience fear. As I looked back on my life I realized that although I felt fear almost constantly, I had this ability to push through my fears and do what was necessary, whether it was walking onto a sports field, or knocking on a neighbor’s door to sell them something.

But I didn’t always overpower my fears. There were many times I gave into fear and allowed fear to win. And when fear won, I lost. It could have been closing a large account or failing to take advantage of a new opportunity. As a sales trainer I recognized myself in most of my students. Typically they were afraid to use all that I taught them because fear stood in their way.

After ten years of this I felt it was time to write my book Overpowering Fear – Defeating the #1 Challenge in Sales and Life. The book opened up for me the opportunity to fulfill my real passion, and that is to travel the world doing corporate keynotes and workshops. Overpowering fear was not only for salespeople, but for every employee in an organization who let’s their fears stand in the way of their success.

This has led to a second passion, speaking to college students. I have always believed a degree will get you a job, but it is these five life skills that will get you a successful career.

  • Learn How to Sell – Even Rich-Dad Robert Kiyosaki said everyone needs this skill.
  • Learn How to Network – Not on the internet, but in person. The stronger your network the greater the chances for success.
  • Learn How to Speak in Public – Nothing will get you noticed in your industry quicker than public speaking.
  • Understand Cause and Effect – Knowing this universal law will keep you out of trouble and if you’re lucky, put you in the right place at the right time.
  • Learn to Tell Stories – From our tribal past people love to learn through stories.

If you know a college looking for a speaker with a different message I would appreciate an introduction to the right person. If you live in the San Francisco Bay Area and know a high school that would like me to speak about Overpowering Fear and learning these five life skills, please let me know that too. Colleges are fee based. High schools are free.

My best to you always,


Other’s Lives Are Not Always What We Think

4 Jan

People assume I’m out there having this great life, but money doesn’t erase the pain. When you’re young you barrel through life, making choices without thinking of repercussions. A few years down the line, you wake up in a certain place and wonder how the hell you got there. – Jennifer Lopez

So beautiful, so talented, and so very much like each of us.

There are two very important lessons to be learned in today’s quote. So let’s talk about them.

I think growing up in America most of us share a common dream; to be rich, talented and famous. And the wonderful thing about this great country is that each of us has an equal opportunity to achieve what we seek. It’s the American Dream. Of course, we do need a little talent to begin with.

But there is a lie behind the dream. The lie is that once we attain our fame and riches our lives will somehow be perfect. We expect to be happy. We expect to magically overpower and face all of our fears and demons. We expect tranquility, but instead those who reach their dream often feel the same fears, doubts and uncertainties they did before they became famous.

Fame, fortune and notoriety may drive your ego to the point of arrogance, but it won’t change how you view yourself. Only you can make that change by controlling the thoughts you allow to take hold in your mind.

The other important lesson to be learned in today’s quote is this: every day you make hundreds, perhaps even thousands of decisions. Most you do unconsciously without much forethought. What should I have for lunch? Should I take the freeway or surface streets to work? Others we do consciously by giving more thought and consideration to the decision we will make; should I accept that position in Boston and how will this affect my family?

Each decision is a choice, and each choice has its consequences and repercussions. Some of those will be good, some bad and some dire. There is a name for this; we call it Cause and Effect. Every choice you make is a cause and what happens afterwards to you are its effects.

Ms. Lopez believes that it happens to you mostly when you’re young. I disagree. Unless you learn how cause and effect works in your life you will continue to make wrong, kneejerk choices. And those choices will bring into your life exactly what you don’t want.

So my advice: Think things through before you make your decision. Then choose wisely.

To your dreams and better choices,